Book: Lady Gaga - Just Dance
Author: Helia Phoenix
As Lady Gaga sashays onto the stage at the Brit Awards to collect her third trophy of the night, I’m sitting comfortably at home in front of the TV, a book resting on my lap. My Tuesday evening read is no Grisham-esque thriller easy to get my teeth into, but - ever so aptly - an exclusive copy of the woman wearing the most strikingly bizarre costume since Bjork sported her infamous swan.
Written by a certain Welsh-born Helia Phoenix (whoever that may be) ‘Lady Gaga - Just Dance’ tells the tale of young innocent Stefani Joanne Angelina Germanotta on her quest for fame and fortune. In doing so, the reader is given an insight into her relationship with her array of famous buddies and musical and iconic role models. Phoenix illustrates the anecdotes with a number of full colour pictures but the overabundance of secondary sourced quotes give the impression that the arisen-from-the-ashes author may not have had too much contact with LG while writing her opus, but maybe a bit of a literary paparazzi instead. Pun intended.
Nonetheless, there’s nothing wrong with the story told. An angelic blonde-haired girl from a good Italian New York family turns into a fantastic exhibitionist performer whose obsession with having a penis is almost as well-known as her penchant for shocking people. On the way she wins a few competitions, awards, scholarships and prizes and also attends the same school as the Hilton sisters.
Like any run-of-the mill biography it begins by painting a heart-warming scene of an uncorrupted infant playing with her parents. The text is full of clichés, stereotypes and word redundancy, and the style of writing is all but imaginative, but it does end on a happy note and is certainly not a read that will give you brain ache. Marks out of ten? I’d probably say a weak 4. My advice: Wait until Gaga writes her own book. It will happen just after she begins selling Eau de Gaga and her own fashion label.
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